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What's Inside
March, 2008
Deciding to move to a residence
My Way
by Ursula Feist
I had a long and tortuous conversation with an old friend who has to decide whether or not to move to a residence. Like so many others in this position, he knows it will be a momentous change in his life. There will be some loss of independence, rules to follow, and the need to adapt. To be popular in new surroundings requires a smile rather than a frown.
If one is living alone and cannot cope with running a house, maybe the time has come to consider making the move. Thorough homework is required. Waiting too long means that others will make this vital decision and it may not be the right one.
It can be a difficult decision but the plus is that someone else will be doing the chores.
No more worries about who gardens, fixes the plumbing or electricity, replaces light bulbs, gets the garbage out on time, cooks dinner or cleans up.
My father died at 64 but I wish he were around for me to look after him. I know that times have changed: aging parents no longer live with their children;
seniors have become more independent; children are too busy running their own lives; and the generation gap has widened significantly. That is why so many residences and homes have sprung up that are tailored to meet the needs of our aging generation.
Before making a final choice, one should visit several residences, find out what is available and examine the premises. Compatibility with residents, sometimes from different backgrounds, can be an issue, as well as quality of food, the nearest shopping center or library and adequate transportation. Financial resources have to be examined. If a government-subsidized residence is required, a CLSC and a social worker may have to be involved.
I have visited friends in residences and what struck me was that most of them seem quite happy. There are activities in most residences such as lectures, discussion groups, bridge, bingo, exercise classes, maybe swimming pools, outings, movies and the opportunity to make friends. No need to be alone, if one doesn’t want to be.
Sure, the front door is no longer yours, but if you should fall, there will be somebody there to pick you up! Bob Hope said: “I don’t feel old. I don’t feel anything until noon. Then it’s time for my nap.”
